Apparently, I’m Too Self-Conscious To Zumba!

Zumba. There. I said it. I tried to Zumba yesterday.

um, this does look fun, right?!

For those of you who haven’t heard of Zumba-ing it’s a sort of a Latin-inspired, calorie-burning, exercise that’s supposed to feel like a dance party. Not for me.

Like most things, I wanted to give it a go in the comfort of my own home. test it out, if you will. I figured, what the heck? I have a Latin lover why not a Latin exercise routine? Apparently, the two do not go hand in hand.

So, I spent perhaps an hour just prowling YouTube looking for the best beginner Zumba video to follow on my TV. I was thinking, Hey! These gals look like they’re having some fun! All smiles, and dance party-like.

I pull up a Zumba video to Shakira’s “Waka Waka” with my DirecTV and get ready to bust a move. I turn it on, get through half of a booty shake and then realize my front blinds are open and I would rather not everyone driving past watch me attempting to channel my inner Shakira. Mostly because I don’t think I have one. Heh.

Pause. I close my blinds. I feel a little bit better. No one can see me.

Or can they? Can people see through the cracks in my blinds?! Oh MY goodness! The UPS man will be dropping off a package today…but when does he normally come by? He’s definitely going to know I am Zumba-ing my ass off in my living room. For sure. That’s embarrassing.

I got over it. I’m sure my UPS man won’t judge. Right? No one can see through my blinds.

Restart. Two minutes into the short video I’m looking around like someone can see me. My dogs are perched atop the couch watching me. I could see it in their eyes, they were worried, “Is she having spasms?” Too bad we don’t have thumbs to dial 911. Oh well, Dad will feed up dinner when he gets home.

I ignore the dogs. But not for long. Commence looking around, still shaking ass and flailing my arms like a baby bird that can’t fly. I giggle. The I giggle some more. Gosh, I’m such an idiot. Now I can’t stop laughing at myself. Inner Shakira? Shhhmmm. I can’t dance!

I’m not sure I have what it takes to Zumba in my living room, let alone in front of others.



  1. Audrey says:

    i'm a decent dancer but when i took zumba classes sometimes i felt like i was doing it all wrong.
    but you pick it up and you have fun.
    best of all you get some good cardio in!


  2. Tara says:

    oh man, the first time I zumba'd I actually went to a class and it was the most embarrassing thing ever. I mean, to be honest I certainly wasn't the worst there (at zumba I mean) but I just felt so freaking awkward! and then I had terrible knee pain the next day and my doctor told me that with my bad knees I really shouldn't be doing zumba, since it's a lot of jumping around and twisting and twirling. no skin off my back!


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